SPEAKER_01: 0:28

It's Tuesday. Oh my gosh, listen to my voice.

SPEAKER_03: 0:31

Uh oh. Do you want to try that one more time or are you just good with it? We'll just roll with it. We'll roll with it. I'm gonna drink some coffee and see if that doesn't fix it. You guys, we record on Saturday mornings, and sometimes the coffee hasn't kicked in, and sometimes we're still a little sleepy.

SPEAKER_01: 0:45

So I think that's Oh, you know what? I'm not gonna be able to fix it. Yesterday was homecoming. I actually am not gonna be able to talk better. Oh and this has nothing to do with sleepy voice. I bet I strained my voice yesterday.

SPEAKER_03: 0:59

I bet you did too. Oh goodness. Okay.

SPEAKER_01: 1:01

I have sexy Phoebe sick voice.

SPEAKER_03: 1:04

Yes.

SPEAKER_01: 1:08

No.

SPEAKER_03: 1:09

Yes. I love it. Well, we're so glad you're here today. It's um, I'm sorry, Halloween is over. So did you know it's already Christmas? Right?

unknown: 1:19

Right?

SPEAKER_03: 1:19

So that means it's holiday tipping. Don't make no mistake, I love Thanksgiving. But what I'm saying is all of the ads have already turned over to Christmas. And I will say, when I was in the craft stores helping my son with his project before Halloween, there was already Christmas stuff out.

SPEAKER_01: 1:38

So oh my gosh, Christmas stuff comes out after Easter. Let's be real. That's very true.

SPEAKER_03: 1:43

Okay. Well, today, since it's Christmas, we're talking about holiday tipping. So, who to tip, how much to tip them, and how to do it without completely breaking the bank, and what to do if it's just not in your budget. Love it.

SPEAKER_01: 1:58

But first, she might tip 20% of the bill, but she's got a hundred percent of my heart. Oh, Caitlin.

SPEAKER_03: 2:08

Yes. That's the full service. Yes. The service fee.

unknown: 2:13

Yes.

SPEAKER_03: 2:13

Uh that's Jenny, everyone's favorite brilliantly flustered cowgirl. I I don't know.

SPEAKER_01: 2:20

It's perfect. Because last night's homecoming was Western themed. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So I did do somewhere in the neighborhood of 18 hours in cowboy boots.

SPEAKER_03: 2:32

Oh my.

SPEAKER_01: 2:33

But I say in the neighborhood because there was a point at school where I just took them off and walked the halls in my socks.

SPEAKER_03: 2:39

Oh, okay. Perfect. That's not gross at all.

SPEAKER_01: 2:42

No. That is not even close to being the grossest thing I've done as a medical school assistant principal.

SPEAKER_03: 2:47

Well, please tell me that you had dark socks on because otherwise the white socks were destroyed.

SPEAKER_01: 2:53

White with sushi. Oh. But it's okay because I have three pairs of exactly the same socks because my mom gave them to me for Christmas three years in a row. She does not have dementia. She just couldn't remember that she already gave me these socks. That would be a really great gift.

SPEAKER_03: 3:09

Ladies and gentlemen, mom brain does not go away once your kids are adults. It lingers. Okay, so do we have any shout-outs today? I have one. I know. Do you have one?

SPEAKER_01: 3:20

Yes. Yes. So I want to acknowledge that this episode is airing after the election, but it is recorded before. Yes. And so I know that like no other time in history, emotions are really high around elections, particularly those at the federal level. And I want to offer support to those who are unhappy or worried about the results, whether it be in their local election or um for their legislators or even for the president. Your vote mattered. Please, please continue to vote. Thank you for taking the time to participate. And we are with you. It doesn't matter what side of the aisle you sit on. We want you to know that your vote does matter, and we're glad that you cast it.

SPEAKER_03: 4:10

That is very well said and appreciated. So I'm thank you for that. Um anxieties, if I mean, as you and I are recording this now, again, it's before the election, my anxiety is very high. I imagine that some for some people after the election, their anxiety is now high. So it just do what you can to take care of yourself. But again, so true, your vote did matter. You took part in the process. That's a good thing. Um, I have one, but mine is it's kind of mental health related, I suppose. Um we, if you haven't rated, reviewed, and subscribed, please. This is your plug to do that. Um, someone who is um, I'm gonna leave their name out of this, left us a review on Spotify, which you can now do. That's a new feature. Yeah. Um, and we had an episode about making adult friends.

SPEAKER_01: 5:05

And this person Thanks to the Junior League of Austin. Yes, for doing a whole segment on that that I could then steal the content and reuse.

SPEAKER_03: 5:16

Perfect. Um, this person commented on the episode, thank you. This is helpful. I've attempted suicide four times and struggle with depression. I love the positive, high energy and laughter. It helps. May I ask for laughter throughout future episodes? Uh, I'd like to say to that person, first of all, um, we're no stranger to mental health struggles. Um suicide and depression are things that both of us have experience with. Um, but just know that laughter is our love language, and we will definitely continue to make each other laugh as much as we can. Oh, for sure. Um, if not, if not because we're we're funny, but because it might we might have made an awkward moment that we just have to laugh through.

SPEAKER_01: 6:02

So And like I've said, if nothing else, I'm around for downward social comparison. Right. You can always laugh at me, even if you can't laugh with me.

SPEAKER_03: 6:11

Right. You can blame stuff on me, and you can laugh at me. That's that's how this this works.

SPEAKER_01: 6:18

So um You had posted on our socials that it was Jersey Day at our school. Yes. So I did go through with it and I did go as snooky. You did.

SPEAKER_03: 6:29

I saw the picture, it's perfect.

SPEAKER_01: 6:30

And I I would hard to put together a snooky look that is appropriate for school. Let me just tell you this. A hundred percent. But someone said, Oh my gosh, that's amazing. But also, like how? And I said, Well, here's the thing: I am always just one decision away from getting fired.

SPEAKER_03: 6:47

Yeah. Also, I have to say, am I allowed to post that picture on our socials? Because there's hundreds. Okay, there has been demand. There have been picks where it didn't happen, and there have been like, please follow up. So I will post that. If you haven't seen it, go to our socials. It's there. Um, today we are again talking about holiday tipping. So my sources for today are an article from Fidelity, uh Holiday Tipping Guide 2024, How Much to Tip. Another one from the Wall Street Journal. This is Holiday Tipping 2023, which I imagine will get updated very soon, but the the gist remains the same. Um, and another article from Real Simple called Everyone You Should Remember to Tip Over the Holidays and How Much to Give. So I'll make sure that those are linked in the blog post for this episode. Yeah. Okay. So holiday tipping, who to tip, how much to give them. It's a whole thing, right? Um, in terms of tipping, I know the basics. Uh, you always tip your server at the restaurant, you tip your hairdresser, unless you have an amazing hairdresser like mine who says no, don't tip me. It's included in the service fee. Um, generally, I tip the people who do things for me that I can't do myself, like Dwight Shroot, right? Oh, I can't do it myself. Right? If I don't do it myself, then I should probably tip them for that.

SPEAKER_01: 8:09

I think I said this before. Yeah. But when I was 16, I was at a Red Sox game at Fenway, sitting in the cheap seats with a bunch of college kids.

SPEAKER_02: 8:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 8:22

And they were talking about tipping. And one of them said in his best Boston accent, what did you do besides your job? Okay. And I was like, that is a great rule for tipping. Yeah. Above it. Yeah. Chiching.

SPEAKER_03: 8:42

There's also this like explosion of tipping culture, right? Like where you're being asked to tip on things that you've never would have been asked to tip on before. And it's okay to say no on those things.

SPEAKER_01: 8:54

Have you seen the video where it's a parent-teacher conference and at the end she turns the computer around?

SPEAKER_03: 8:58

She turns her thing. This is just gonna ask you a couple of questions. That's so good. Like, oi, and we'll get into that later. Okay. So there are rules about tipping that I did not know.

SPEAKER_04: 9:09

Ooh.

SPEAKER_03: 9:09

Uh, in fact, I only recently learned that you're supposed to tip your hotel staff when they clean your room.

SPEAKER_01: 9:17

Oh, definitely if you're staying more than one night. Yes. Okay, if you're only staying one, I'm not gonna tell you not to tip, but I am gonna tell you you're only staying one night. But if you are staying multiple nights, little fiver on the bed makes a big difference. I just never have cash. So I just oh well, and that's the thing. Whenever we travel, like that's part of my job to get ready is to make sure that I pull cash because we'll get to the airport and we'll do the sky cab. And we're like, oh, we don't have any ones to tip for the bags. Yeah. Oh, we just took a cab and now we don't have any cash to tip the cabbie. Like, I mean, so it's um it's part of my like travel culture in my mind is like I have to make sure that I pull cash and I go into the bank. Did you know you can go inside a bank? I used to work at a bank. So yes, I did know you could go in. You still can. You still can in 2024. And they will give you the money that you want. Yes, you can if it's in your account.

SPEAKER_03: 10:15

Right.

SPEAKER_01: 10:16

If you have access to that money, they will give it to you. But I will say, like, hey, I need 10 ones.

SPEAKER_03: 10:22

Yeah. Or whatever. And they'll they'll and they'll even count it out for you because they're required to. Yeah. I I used to love the people who would go to the ATM, come back in with like 220s and say, break this up for me. Because then I don't even have to do any paperwork. All I had to do was just be like, that's hilarious.

SPEAKER_01: 10:39

And it goes faster. So I'm and you didn't tell them, like, hey guys, you actually don't have to make this a two-step process. We are indeed a one-stop shop.

SPEAKER_03: 10:47

No, they did it that way on purpose because then they wouldn't have to fill out the paper. They could just do it like, yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 10:53

Got it, got it.

SPEAKER_03: 10:53

I loved it.

SPEAKER_01: 10:54

That actually is smart now.

SPEAKER_03: 10:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 10:56

Okay, sorry.

SPEAKER_03: 10:57

No worries.

SPEAKER_01: 10:58

Anyway, um, you know what, Disney, they're not housekeeping, they're mousekeeping. Oh, you're definitely gotta tip your mousekeepers.

SPEAKER_03: 11:04

Okay, yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 11:05

Sorry, continue on. Anyway, so there's a way for me to weave Disney, and I will.

SPEAKER_03: 11:11

Let's be real. I have to show you my cruise magnets at some point. Anyway.

SPEAKER_01: 11:15

Oh my god, I also ordered some for you.

SPEAKER_03: 11:18

It's gonna be like office space with the flair.

SPEAKER_01: 11:22

It is, it is definitely giving flair.

SPEAKER_03: 11:24

That's amazing.

SPEAKER_00: 11:25

So good. Okay, sorry guys, continue on.

SPEAKER_03: 11:29

Okay, so today we're giving you some guidelines around tipping, including how to say thank you. Another way of tipping just isn't in your budget for everyone this year, which is understandable. AF. Okay, right. So, first, tipping is not obligatory. That word should where you should yourself, don't use it here. Okay. A holiday tip is a token of gratitude for the people who helped you this year. It's not tit for tat, okay? This is not gift giving obligation stress where someone gives you something that they found at TJ Maxx, and then you also have to go, oh shoot, I didn't give them a gift. Let me go to Costco and get you some Lindor Lints and hand them off to you. Like, this is not what this is. You're laughing because you know I'm right. This is what people think.

SPEAKER_00: 12:18

That is so accurate. Yeah. Here is this candle that still has the markdown sticker on it.

SPEAKER_03: 12:24

Right. And it probably smells terrible if you light it. Don't light it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 12:29

Oh my gosh, that's amazing.

SPEAKER_03: 12:31

Yeah. So there's also some stigma around the word tipping. Right. Uh so if you feel better calling it a bonus, call it a bonus. That's fine. That's essentially what a like when you work, if you get a work bonus, it's basically a tip. So just fine. Okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 12:51

And I I see it through the lens of bonus as well. That like and this is helps. Um, we'll we'll talk about timing a little bit as uh as we get further in the episode. But like I always try and make sure that it is a holiday bonus that arrives before the holiday so that they can spend it on the holiday. But we'll talk a little bit more about that later.

SPEAKER_03: 13:09

Yeah, we'll get there. Yep. Okay. Two. Second, set a budget. Okay. Include tips in your overall holiday gift giving budget and set aside any money that you do plan to give. Okay. If you're saying that I'm gonna spend this much on gifts, carve out a piece of that and use it for tipping. If you can't give the recommended amounts, which we will get to in a minute, we have a plan for that. No stress. Okay.

unknown: 13:40

Okay.

SPEAKER_03: 13:40

Okay. Third, make a list.

SPEAKER_01: 13:44

And check it twice.

SPEAKER_03: 13:45

Gonna find out who it's not Christmas. It's not Christmas yet. Okay. Sorry. Um who helps you during the year? Okay. The nanny or the babysitter. Your dog walker or pet sitter. Your house cleaner, your doorman, any maintenance workers, your personal trainer, your hairstylist. This list of people for me, I don't know about you, but for me, this list of people is long. Right. Help me, right? Who do things for me that I cannot do for myself. So what you need to do when you look at this list is start to prioritize, right? Prioritize by how regularly you use their services. If you're like me and you don't get a haircut very often, that person can go lower on your list than, say, your housekeeper who might come every two weeks. Right.

SPEAKER_01: 14:42

And for me, I do not give a year-end bonus, holiday tip, whatever we're gonna call this, uh extra money to either a dog sitter or my hairstylist because I always tip my dog sitter uh when I come back and my dogs are alive. I always send a little extra money.

SPEAKER_03: 15:01

Yes.

SPEAKER_01: 15:01

And then my hairstylist, I always tip 30%.

SPEAKER_03: 15:05

Yeah. So I take care of you all year long. Yes.

SPEAKER_01: 15:08

So I'm fine with not giving her a holiday year-end bonus.

SPEAKER_03: 15:12

Sure. Especially if you go get a haircut around the you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01: 15:16

Otherwise, you're gonna see that I'm not a natural blonde.

SPEAKER_03: 15:19

All right. So the other thing you can prioritize by is how long you've known them. That's great. All right. And the biggest life changers. So if there are some things in there that that really, really, really impacted your life in a special way or whatever.

SPEAKER_01: 15:37

They care for your children, something like that.

SPEAKER_03: 15:40

All right. Just make sure that you you prioritize people because there are people who you can move to the bottom of the list, and that's okay. Okay. When to tip? This episode's coming out in mid-November. So, like now? Yeah. Now is a good time. Don't wait until Christmas Eve. This money is likely gonna go towards any holiday expenses. So it might go towards a vacation or gifts or whatever. So use that to help motivate you.

SPEAKER_01: 16:12

Trying to pay their property taxes before they're due mid-January. Oh no.

SPEAKER_03: 16:16

Just saying. Just saying. Oh Lord.

SPEAKER_01: 16:18

Just getting it out there. Right. Some people don't escrow.

SPEAKER_03: 16:21

Right. So here are some guidelines. These are courtesy of Lizzie Post as in Emily Post Institute. Yes. Lizzie Post is the co-president of the Emily Post Institute.

SPEAKER_01: 16:34

She suggests I had an Emily Post wedding guide. Yes. Okay. How'd that go? Um, no, no, no. Someone gave it to me and she signed it. Then I signed it and gave it to someone else. And then and like it's been through like five or six brides with all of our names in it. It's really cute.

SPEAKER_03: 16:50

I love that.

SPEAKER_01: 16:51

Okay, sorry, continue on.

SPEAKER_03: 16:53

No worries. She suggests what's called the up to rule. I love this rule. This makes so much sense. Okay. Look at up to a week's pay or up to one session's pay and consider this the guiding amount for your people. Okay. Use your discretion for the relationship that you have with this person to go up or down accordingly. Okay. I love that. If you're planning to hand out a check or cash, add a card. It's festive, it makes it less awkward. You're not shoving money into someone's hand and saying, you know, happy holidays. You're gonna just say, you know, you leave the card out and you ta-da, there you go. Okay. You can come like absolutely tip within an app. When you do that, just include a personalized message. That's it. Totally fine. If you normally pay your housekeeper using Venmo, just add the cash or add the amount there and just say like happy holidays. Like, you know what I mean? It's all good. Okay.

SPEAKER_01: 18:03

I will say something. Find out how your service provider would like to be tipped.

SPEAKER_03: 18:10

Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

SPEAKER_01: 18:14

Because I do not accept payment for my tutoring business through anything besides check because I like to have the checks as a document for the IRS. So when people want to Venmo me, I look at them and I'm saying, I'm really sorry. I work in the 1980s. You have to write me a paper check. We can also do a bank-to-bank transfer, but I cannot use a payment app because I do not want the IRS to look at my entire Venmo history and try and sift through what is Jenny GK educational services versus what is Jenny GK as a person.

SPEAKER_03: 18:52

Sure. That makes a lot of sense. My pet sitter is the same. She prefers a paper check. Yes. Um, and there have been times where we've forgotten to leave the check before she comes. And we've said, Can we pay you? And it doesn't work that way.

SPEAKER_01: 19:06

So we end up having to get the check over to her a different way because she's but she still keeps your cats alive. Because she understands having been in that seat, not everyone is a paper check person. Some people have to dig through a drawer to find one. Right. But it is really important to me that I have that documentation. Totally fine. This is really important. If the person runs their own business, please ask them how they would like to receive a bonus. That's a good, that's a good call.

SPEAKER_03: 19:35

I like that. Okay. Let's get to some recommended amounts, shall we? Love it.

SPEAKER_01: 19:40

That's the most important part. That's all that people care about anyway.

SPEAKER_03: 19:42

Right, exactly.

SPEAKER_01: 19:44

Oh, I'm sorry. You guys are listening to this whole episode and finding it all riveting. My my apologies.

SPEAKER_03: 19:50

I'm not insulted by the way that I've organized this episode at all. Um here are some common things.

SPEAKER_00: 19:58

No, you're putting the most important part right there. Right.

SPEAKER_03: 20:01

Come on, guys. Here we go. And about how much to give them. Your babysitter or nanny, uh, one typical session or one week's pay, depending on babysitter, one typical session, nanny, one week's pay. Your daycare staffer, this is a big old oops. I did not know this was a tip, but I always gave nice gifts. Okay. Uh 25 to 75 bucks, depending on how many hours your child is with them. Okay. Uh hairstylist, cost of one service. In-home caregiver, one week's pay.

SPEAKER_00: 20:33

Okay.

SPEAKER_03: 20:34

House cleaner, the cost of one visit is the recommended amount. Again, these are also up to amounts, right? So just up to is okay. Um a landscaper, which I ain't got one. One session.

SPEAKER_01: 20:47

Oh man, you gotta use lawn starter. It's like the Uber of lawn mowing. Oh. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03: 20:55

We'll get to that in a minute.

SPEAKER_01: 20:56

So usually it put in when you want one, and then whoever available just comes and does it. Smart. Okay. So we don't have like a established relationship. Okay, great. Yeah, no, sorry, continue on. Okay. Uh pool cleaners.

SPEAKER_03: 21:09

I also don't have one of these. Um, one session, and they can divide the money amongst themselves. If you have a regular massage therapist, the cost of one session. Your manicurist, pedicurist, aesthetician that you see all the time, if it's a consistent person, the cost of one session. Your newspaper delivery person did not know you were supposed to tip this person. I don't, we don't get a newspaper, so there you go. Uh, about 10 to 30 bucks.

SPEAKER_01: 21:39

Yeah, I was gonna say, like, should I just tip ATT internet? Like, how do I do that?

SPEAKER_03: 21:45

Uh uh um your personal trainer, which props to you if you have one. Good job. Uh, I don't have one. The cost of one session. Your pet sitter, dog walker, groomer, cost of one session, sanitation workers. This is a good one to add to your list.

SPEAKER_01: 22:03

Uh, 10 to 30 bucks each. So let me tell you this. Our neighborhood rallies together and tips them all as one.

SPEAKER_03: 22:13

We will get to that because that is a great strategy. I love that. Okay. Yeah, okay. I'm out. I'm out. Yep. Um, also, a few other people to consider if you live in an apartment. Um, if you're a renter, renters tend to give less than owners. So just keep that in mind. Okay. Um, your super or your resident manager, 150 to 300 bucks. That's a lot of money. It's a lot of money. So just keep, you know, again, these are we will get to it if the money is not in your budget. Okay. Your door attendant or concierge, if you have one,$75 to$200. A porter or handyman or maintenance staff,$25 to$50. A garage attendant, especially if it's one who regularly looks out for you and knows you, knows your car, those things,$25 to$75. Cool. Um I want to make it very clear. These are expenses that people, many people, do not opt into. Um, here's what I mean by that. If I can't afford to tip my server at a restaurant, I am not going to go eat at a restaurant, and neither should you. If you can't afford the tip at the restaurant, don't go to the restaurant Uber eats that mess or something, right? Like it's part of how they make a living. Okay. So you that's an opt-in expense, right? Like you are choosing to go to a restaurant, so you are opting into paying that tip. An in-home caregiver or a super, these are not opt-in expenses. Okay. Your super takes care of your apartment regardless of whether or not you need them all the time or just one time. You you are not opting into having a super, you have a super. That's just how that works.

SPEAKER_01: 24:08

Um, so and they're not only managing calls that you make. Right. Right? There could be building wide things that they're handling that you don't even know they put that fire out before you got to it.

SPEAKER_03: 24:19

Right. So prioritize expenses for people that you you don't opt into, that you have all the time, rather than the optional ones. Okay. Now, um, those that's big money. That's big money, especially if you do have all of those people. That's also um maybe maybe if you have all those people you can afford. But but if you only have one or two of them and you can't, we got to talk about what to do because that's that's big money. Okay. Right. Um, that list isn't even exhaustive, but there are definitely some people on it that you might not be able to thank with money. And that's completely okay, right? And there are people on that, well, not on that list, but there are people in your life who will support you that cannot accept a cash gift, right? Or they can't accept a gift over a certain amount. So they can't accept gift cards or anything. Like, for example, your postal worker who you might be very tempted, because I have a regular postal worker. Like you might be tempted to offer them something. They can't accept it, right? It's they can't get any more than 20 bucks per calendar year. I I did see 50 on another website. I don't know which one is accurate.

SPEAKER_01: 25:36

That's interesting.

SPEAKER_03: 25:37

Yeah. Delivery drivers are often discouraged from taking cash tips, even if you have a regular one. Um, so we'll get to what you can do for them in a second. But um, you might have to check with like in-home care providers to see what their policies are for taking money. So just keep that in mind as you start prioritizing your life.

SPEAKER_01: 26:00

It really makes sense. Um, you know, when I was growing up and we lived on the Air Force Base, um, the people who bag your groceries and then bring them out to your car work for tips. Yeah. But if you go to the major grocery conglomerate here in Texas who uh goes by their initials, um, they're not allowed to accept tips. That was a major culture shift for us when we moved here. We were like, wait, we don't tip you? They're like, No, no, no, we can't accept tips. Well, that's because they're being paid.

SPEAKER_03: 26:32

Right. Yeah. Very different. Okay. So here are some alternatives to warm, soft, beautiful cash. Here we go. Cards with heartfelt messages and/or artwork from your kids. This, like, there's some really cute ways to you can do stuff like that. Um, baked treats. I I caution there are people who will say, Oh, thank you for the baked treat, but then won't eat it. Uh, so just something like maybe it's from a bakery and it's pre-packaged or something like that. Okay. Um, you can leave out snacks and beverages for delivery drivers and postal workers. This is what I do every year. Uh, I put out like a cooler and a basket, and I have like bags of chips, and I have fruit roll-ups and candy and things like that, so that when they come every 12 to 24 hours to my house, they get in have a treat. Yeah? Okay. Yes. Um, I saw this idea. I thought it was cute. Work socks. Okay. What more? Like super like padded, nice work socks. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? Like for inside the boots. Yeah. I thought that was a good idea.

SPEAKER_01: 27:50

Like, I don't even know what a work sock is. But just something that's yeah, that's like padded or duty, like socks working.

SPEAKER_03: 27:57

Yes, like a double, or even something with double layer so that they don't get blisters. Like, there's there are double-layered socks like that. That might be a good idea. I thought that was cute. Um, you mentioned pooling, as in pooling cash.

SPEAKER_00: 28:09

Yes.

SPEAKER_03: 28:09

That is a great way to be budget friendly because there's always people who are going to be willing to give more than others. And there's usually a recommended amount, but people understand if you can't give the recommended amount, they just appreciate that you gave anything. So this is a great way to take on class gifts for teachers or collections for apartment building workers, office maintenance staff, your local sanitation team, etc.

SPEAKER_01: 28:38

It's good. It's good. Yeah, I like it.

SPEAKER_03: 28:40

Okay.

SPEAKER_01: 28:41

Yeah, they um they just put a message out in our neighborhood group, and um, you can Venmo the person, you can send cash, whatever, but then they put it all together in a Visa gift card and then deliver it to the team, or you know, multiple gift cards, I guess. But deliver that to the team with coffee and donuts. And so there's like a little social if you in the neighborhood are available during that time, you can go and thank them in person as well.

SPEAKER_03: 29:05

Yeah, that's perfect. I love that. Okay. That said, when you just can't tip, right, like nothing. Like you've got you are paycheck to paycheck.

SPEAKER_01: 29:16

Or they made it to the bottom of the list.

SPEAKER_03: 29:18

They are not going to, yeah. They're not prior, yeah, they're not in your budget. Inflation is still a problem. You might not be able to do anything. We get it, right? Chances are the person that you plan to tip gets it too. Right? Like they're not going to hold it against you. A tip is an add-on. It's not an expectation for these people, right? As it is for, say, for example, someone who is your server at a restaurant, right?

SPEAKER_01: 29:50

Like it's it's where they are working for$215 an hour and expect you to supplement that income with tips.

SPEAKER_03: 29:57

Right.

SPEAKER_01: 29:57

Right.

SPEAKER_03: 29:58

I'm sure that the person who you planned to tip would rather you just keep paying for the service, like with regular support, than be stressed about an optional holiday bonus. Okay. Right. If it bothers you, you can write a heartfelt note that is very transparent about what's going on. Okay. It's okay to say something like, thank you so much for all of your hard work this year. This year things are tight and I find myself unable to provide cash tips and bonuses, but this is not a reflection on you or your support. I truly appreciate you and I wish I could do more to say thank you. I wish you and yours a beautiful holiday season.

SPEAKER_01: 30:44

The world is crazy right now. It's fine.

SPEAKER_03: 30:46

It happens and people understand it's okay. And you just need to let that shame go. Okay. Just they don't expect it. It's not an expectation, it's a bonus. All right. So no matter what, when it comes to tipping, don't feel anxious about the amount you tip. Your anxiety is probably like mine, where it's like you're not giving enough, but that's just not the case. Okay. Tipping is not a contest. People just appreciate that you did anything to show them that you value the work that they do. So do what you can. It's enough.

SPEAKER_01: 31:21

Nice.

SPEAKER_03: 31:22

And that's like a good thing to live by. I think so.

SPEAKER_00: 31:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03: 31:27

Okay. Yeah. Now let's take a break. For links to resources mentioned in this episode, head on over to ck and gkpodcast.com/slash blog to find everything you need. And be sure to follow us on social media. Head over to your favorite social media network and find us at CKNGK Podcast. And now back to the show. Okay, we're back. Yay! Oh your poor voice. Oh dear. We're back. Who are we?

SPEAKER_01: 31:57

HV. Okay. I did that a lot. I also yelled at the eighth graders and said, I will not lose to the lower school in the spirit stick. Oh. And the thing is, like, parents are also invited to this pet rally. And so one of the moms looks at me, she's like, That's right. You will not. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03: 32:17

I love when the parents like get it.

SPEAKER_01: 32:19

Yeah. Like I had a chance there. I really didn't realize. I was like, oh my gosh, maybe these parents are gonna think that this is a problem. But no, they were like, No, they're into it.

SPEAKER_03: 32:27

Yeah, GK series.

SPEAKER_01: 32:29

She's gonna have she's winning that spirit today.

SPEAKER_03: 32:31

I remember bumping into one parent at a holiday event in town, and she was like, Oh, it's Miss Kendra, and she was like, You know, I love me some Miss Kindred. She is all sass. And I went, Oh my gosh, I love these parents. I feel seen. I'm so seen was the best. All right. Speaking of people that love us, what are we obsessed with? What? It's not a good transition, it was just a transition.

SPEAKER_01: 33:04

Speaking of bagels, have you ever been to the driving range? Goodness. Oh my gosh. Okay, so let me tell you what I'm obsessed with right now. Um, it's a little bit old. And guess what? I'm late to the party on a lot of things, guys. Yeah, it's because we have kids and jobs like it's good that it's old because all the episodes are out.

SPEAKER_03: 33:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 33:27

So there you go. Um, Pig Iron from the Tortoise Network. It's a podcast.

SPEAKER_03: 33:35

Okay.

SPEAKER_01: 33:36

Um, it's a seven episode serial about um, it's an earbuds in podcast moms. Okay. Um, but it's about a reporter who was a war coverage reporter who was killed in South Sudan. Oh. And the circumstances around his death are ambiguous. Some people think he was caught in the crossfire, some people think that he became a mercenary and was actually fighting. And so it's really interesting. There is no resolution, um, which you know from the beginning, right? Like you like give away the ending, but it's a deep dive into this guy's experience and the world of war reporting.

SPEAKER_03: 34:28

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 34:29

And the girl who does it is a journalist, but not a world reporter, uh, not a war reporter. So it's really interesting to get her take on that genre of journalism and and the experience that she goes through learning about it. Interesting.

SPEAKER_03: 34:49

Yeah, okay. All right.

SPEAKER_01: 34:52

No, it's good.

SPEAKER_03: 34:53

It's really yeah, I'm I can get into that. That sounds great. Um, I also am into a documentary style uh thing. On Netflix, there's a new Zodiac documentary.

SPEAKER_01: 35:08

Oh my gosh. Like about the Zodiac Killer or about the signs of the Zodiac. What is it?

SPEAKER_03: 35:18

No, it's about the Zodiac Killer and it's about oh yeah. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_01: 35:22

Okay, so you know Abby just made fun of me the other day. She was like, Yeah, put your hair button at top, not drink your pumpkin slice latte and listen to your true crime.

SPEAKER_03: 35:29

First of all, those things are basic because everyone loves them. We've gone into this, right?

SPEAKER_01: 35:34

But I just looked at her and I was like, you shut your mouth.

SPEAKER_03: 35:37

Right. And why do you know a snapper? Right.

unknown: 35:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03: 35:41

Okay, anyway. So yeah, it's it is a theory that they actually think they know who this person is. And we've seen these before, right? Like there's so many of them, but this one is like pretty compelling where I'm going, oh, this is these are like eyewitness accounts of this man being in this area at the same time that someone goes missing and then like walking up to them with blood on their hands. Like it is wild. And I am all in. And I also started watching the Vince McMahon like wrestling one.

SPEAKER_01: 36:17

Oh my god! If I had to pick people on this planet to never watch that, you would be at the top of my list.

SPEAKER_02: 36:26

I I'm in, I'm all in. I'm fascinated. I I'm having like, oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 36:33

Do not tell Johnny or he will talk your ear off the entire time we're on the ship. No, don't talk to me. No, I I haven't watched it. No, this man loves wrestling stories.

SPEAKER_03: 36:48

I well, I did hear the Chris Benoit story finally for the first time.

SPEAKER_01: 36:53

If you haven't listened to that, there's an episode about him and my beyond the ring or behind the ring or under the ring or inside the ring or whatever it is, the documentary show about wrestling, and like every week it features another story. No, I'm not into that. Loves that.

SPEAKER_03: 37:08

No, he doesn't know.

SPEAKER_01: 37:09

Because it is, it's so dramatic. There's so much behind the scenes.

SPEAKER_03: 37:14

No, I um I don't care about that. Does he watch does he listen to the We Watch Wrestling podcast?

SPEAKER_01: 37:20

I don't know that he does. Well, it's Georgia Hard's. He's so busy listening to Uncle Dan slash Father Dan, Dan Patrick.

SPEAKER_03: 37:29

And he also listens to our show. Well, there's that. On occasion, not all the time. But anyway. But enough to do that. Anyway, yeah, no, those are two. I I cannot recognize so we've got Pig Iron by Tortoise Network uh podcast and then the Zodiac documentary and the Vince McMahon documentary on Netflix. Those are our recommendations and obsessions right now.

SPEAKER_01: 37:45

Okay. Okay, gems. All right. So, like I said, it was homecoming last night. And it is John's 20th reunion.

SPEAKER_03: 37:55

He's the whipper snapper.

SPEAKER_01: 37:57

I know. He's so young. He's robbed the cradle on that one. One of the things since rejoining this community that John has been able to get some traction on that he has been working on for, I don't even know, a lot of years, is this alumni effort. And he's like, look, we gotta get people back in the space without a financial ask.

SPEAKER_03: 38:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 38:21

In order to re-engage our alumni, we need to not treat them like a cash cow.

SPEAKER_03: 38:28

The other thing is, too, like it's sort of cyclical. Like if they enjoy the alumni association events, they will start to provide money and it won't be an ask. It will be a this was fun, let's do it. So it's how organic social works. You build the community and then the benefits come. Like it's just it's just logic.

SPEAKER_01: 38:49

Yes, yes. And he has said that multiple times. He's like, Don't ask me for money. No, ask me to come to a party and then where I will enjoy myself and then say, Man, I would love to finance these kinds of things.

SPEAKER_02: 39:03

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01: 39:04

So, anyway, um, he has finally got some traction on that. Our head of school is very much in that camp. Um, he is truly an investor and says, Look, we have to make the experience wonderful for everyone, kids, parents, alumni, community, everyone. And then if you build it, they will come. Sure. So um, last night was homecoming, and it was the first like alumni warm welcome homecoming I have been a part of in the 10 years that I've been a part of the high park community. They had gifts for anyone who claimed to have graduated from there. Like we weren't checking rosters or anything. It was like, oh yeah, you're out, oh, you're an alumna. Oh, you're an alumnus. Come on over to our table. We have a yeti mug for you. We have a bandana for you. Let us buy you dinner tonight. Um, here, get your kids some free ice cream. Like it was incredible. A yeti mug. Yes, like the cute little travel coffee ones that like the eating engraved with alumni on it.

SPEAKER_03: 40:13

I think they're 12, aren't they? Like they whatever.

SPEAKER_01: 40:15

It's yeah, but they look like the nice, like handheldy one that is not huge.

SPEAKER_03: 40:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 40:20

Um, they were beautiful, and it was like such a fun gift to give away because it's like a real gift.

SPEAKER_03: 40:26

Yeah, no, it's a nice it's not like a plastic cheeky one that'll melt when you put your coffee in. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 40:32

Here's a here's a notepad with our stamp on it, right? Like this, no, this is like a real gift. The worst.

SPEAKER_03: 40:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 40:39

Or magnet calendar or something.

SPEAKER_03: 40:41

Like we're a real estate agent. Bad swag is the worst. And be working in like in events, like going to events now. I'm like, bad swag is the worst, like awful. No, that's a good gift. I like it.

SPEAKER_01: 40:54

It was really cool. And even like giving the bandana that's like branded with this year's homecoming. Like, it was really cool. Yeah, it's great. So fun. Um, so anyway, during the halftime show, also congrats to the homecoming queen who is a former student of ours, and I'm so proud of her.

SPEAKER_02: 41:11

Oh, I love it.

SPEAKER_01: 41:11

She totally earned it because if it was voting on who has great spirit and really cares about the school and cares about other people more than herself, it is this woman. It is Oh, and she's a woman now.

SPEAKER_03: 41:23

Oh, I met her when she was 12. Oh, I'm old. Congratulations, little one. We love you. Yes, you're gonna be little forever in my heart.

unknown: 41:31

Right.

SPEAKER_01: 41:32

So, anyhow, um after the presentation of the court, they say, Welcome back, class of 14 and 20 and 04, celebrating your 10 and 20-year reunions. Um, and they bring everyone, the um, the alumni and their families out on the field. And they're standing on the 50 and waving, and they play Stand By Me, and these nearly 40-year-old men start throwing the football around on the field, yelling and screaming, pretending to make touchdowns, rolling around. It was the most playful, beautiful end of the movie moment. I love it, it was so great.

SPEAKER_03: 42:23

Oh, that would have made me emotional if I had been there.

SPEAKER_01: 42:26

Oh my gosh, I got a nine-second video that like it's it that was more than enough. Like, it was just so beautiful. And so, as we're leaving, I sign out with the head of school and I was like, Hey, this was a great party. Thanks so much. Like, how cute were and uh were those guys playing um during halftime? He goes, Oh, like little boys, yeah.

SPEAKER_03: 42:51

Having fun again, just yeah, it was so cute, it was amazing.

SPEAKER_01: 42:54

That's really sweet, and it was so fun to be the hostess of that event, right? Because I do wear multiple hats. My job was sitting at the alumni table, welcoming people back and getting to pass out those fabulous gifts, yeah. And it was just it was a really, really special moment. But watching those kids like they were the grown-up sandlot boys roll around on the football field, it was amazing.

SPEAKER_03: 43:19

I love it. That's wonderful. What a nice experience, my goodness. As we counter, like, you know, war stories and murder with something sweet.

SPEAKER_01: 43:30

So hey, I don't know what happened in the election yet, but I'm sure it wasn't a hundred percent wonderful.

unknown: 43:36

Oh god.

SPEAKER_01: 43:38

My heart is beating too much.

SPEAKER_00: 43:39

You might be really excited about some races and really depressed about other ones. Who knows? Oh my gosh. That proposition you didn't want to pass totally did. Like whatever.

SPEAKER_03: 43:49

Man, here we go. Um, I just need to point out that I came to my desk to work out and there's a sock on my desk. And I don't, it's just one is it a work sock? It is no, but it is clean. Oh, hey, bonus, but I don't understand. It is an ankle uh one lone ankle sock, and I don't know why it's here. That's my gem.

SPEAKER_01: 44:12

Okay, so a friend of mine's kid was trying to raise money to buy um a Lego set, and I told him, Look, I have a basket of unmatched socks. I will pay you 50 cents a pair. Oh yeah. And it was a normal size basket. We are not talking about like this long burger, like takes up space on your kitchen table basket. Like it, I mean, it's about the size of a laptop, right? Sure. Yeah. Maybe two VHS tapes put together. Okay. Oh dear.

SPEAKER_03: 44:41

Age yourself with one line. Done. Thanks. Moving on.

SPEAKER_01: 44:45

I specifically chose that reference. Anyway, he put together 24 pairs of socks in that basket.

SPEAKER_02: 44:53

Hey oh and my friend was like, you do not need to pay him$12.

SPEAKER_01: 44:57

I was like, oh no, no, no, I'm paying$12. No, no, no. This is in light of today's episode, because he was so fast, I am going to tip him three more dollars, mostly because I have a couple of fives in my wallet and no ones. And no ones. But that's not important. Um, but I was like, dude, I can't believe I had 24 pairs worth of unmatched socks in addition to all the other socks that didn't have a mate in that basket.

SPEAKER_03: 45:19

Yeah, and I bet that basket is like way more normal now, like not overflowing. Yeah, it's not overflowing. Um, here's my gem. Okay, sorry. No worries. Um we have a show to do, guys. Yeah. This isn't just like conversation hour, Jen. Come on. Um this is the kind of stuff we do talk about, by the way. This is why we are so connected because we talk about sock baskets and the sock I found on my desk. Um, okay, here's mine is a celebration. The episode about making new adult friends. I took the advice and I made a new adult friend on Halloween. It was the neighbor. Yep. It was the neighbor that I mentioned in the episode who I've been wanting to try and Oh my gosh, you did it. Yeah, I did it.

SPEAKER_01: 46:07

And then after you tie that comfort into that stretch zone nice and fun.

SPEAKER_03: 46:11

And then right after it was over, and we were both in our houses. I sent a message that said that was fun. Would love to get together again sometime. Let me know if next weekend works. So I actually made a real plan. So I'm hoping that we can make that happen.

SPEAKER_01: 46:29

But oh my gosh, I'm so proud of my celebration. Oh, it's nicely done. That's amazing. Did you get her name? I did get her name. I'm gonna keep it. Oh, what's their name? He's like, Oh, I don't know.

SPEAKER_03: 46:49

I don't know, but he was wearing a blue shirt and like and he likes dinosaurs. And I also yeah, great.

SPEAKER_01: 46:59

Dinosaur mom. All right, that is awesome. Okay, well, when you are taking risks and trying to meet new people on your block, make your choices.

SPEAKER_03: 47:13

And when you're tipping people, remember that this is the season for showing gratitude. So however you show it, it's gonna be appreciated. You can do it.

SPEAKER_01: 47:22

All right, whatever you do is gonna be enough. Exactly. Okay.